My confidence has gone missing...

MrA

MrA

Well-Known Member
Feb 8, 2012
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I haven't hacked in so long now, I'm getting sick of being too scared to do so.

Unfortunately our hacking is a bit daunting, we have a fairly busy road, then a track where you meet a lot of walkers and they can be spooky. And there's always a chance of bumping into a trotter too :/

In summer I get my confidence back but every winter it just vanishes again! Its unlikely that I will hack until spring now :(

Ale hacks once or twice a week with my mum and I often join them on foot so I dont think he is missing out, just such a shame its not me riding him.
 
You have been doing great!!. Don't fade now!
Isn't there someone you can hack with???

I totally understand about confidence. I have to try to keep mine with Andi now since
I have just gone back to riding with her.
The trainer said next time we go to trails I could ride her -- I told him
I am totally not ready for that yet!!!
I know what your going thru - its hard sometimes!!
 
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Hacking time in winter is always so limited, riding time in general is, so its not surprising we get out of the habit of things. Just try to stay positive that you will get back there and that your new yard won't pose quite the same issues and will make things easier for you to get back to it :D
 
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Don't worry Ale, you will get there again come the summer, take the pressure off and just enjoy what you do do. I get jelly legs when I hack if I haven't been out in a while, but within a couple of hacks I'm back to being ok again.
 
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It's really hard to keep the confidence up. I always seem to have one area of my riding life where I lack confidence. If I am doing well at jumping, I am doing poorly at flatwork. If I am doing well at hacking, I am doing badly at jumping. I can't seem to do well at everything at one go.

I find a huge pressure to hack out, but if you don't enjoy it there is little point in forcing yourself. I go through stages where I think it's a great idea and then stages where I think it is ridiculous. I am learning to live more 'in the moment' and just do what feels right on the day. Far less pressure that way.
 
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You know, Ale - I think it may genuinely be a seasonal thing. By the end of the year I always used to be full of confidence, feeling my riding had improved and ready to ask my RI to step it up and start to set me some new challenges in the new year. And for 2-3 years on the trot it all fell to pieces. My confidence would evaporate and I'd get anxious and wait for trouble all the time. I even ended up being led around on occasions after a few spooks. I have no answer for it, but like you it all improved again each spring.

Could it be lack of daylight or something like that affecting levels of mood boosting positivity? Light levels have been very low recently. I can only suggest you stop worrying about it. If your Mum is getting Ale out and about he won't be missing out, and there 's no real reason to do something you can't face. After all we are only a short way from the shortest day of the year. After that we'll all gain light and time to start to expand our riding horizons again.
 
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I have that lack of daylight issue.
I fade like a flower when it gets dark.
I had gotten it sounds totally silly but it was called a HAPPY LIGHT!!

They do help
But I also changed all my light bulbs in the whole house
to "daylight" bulbs.
Most places seem to have soft white or cool white bulbs ugh
You have to sometimes look around for the "daylight' ones.
 
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My nerves get worse in winter too I think. I hadn't thought about it being related to lack of daylight making me miserable but there might be something in that. Always riding in the dark, and often in the wind and rain and having a horse who is spookier cos the weather is chilly is definitely a factor though!
 
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Coincidence in my case but since I can only ride after work around d 7 or 8 it's quite dark and I feel nervous riding. Didn't make it any better when my RI told me that horses aren't actually that great in the dark :/
 
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There are plenty of people I could ride with @horseandgoatmom , I just don't want to sadly haha.

Yes @Jane&Ziggy that's the thing, I hate them, ale hates them and all the horses are petrified of them!

Think you might be right @selside, its a sunny day today and I already feel like doing more with ale than I have done on the dark miserable days lately. I think I will just leave it until the days get lighter and then try again. My mum enjoys hacking him anyway, she was out for almost 2 hours yesterday and is going out on sat too, so he's still having his hacking fun! Just with someone more confident than me haha!
 
When its cold and dark and rainy I would far rather get on my bike and go for a ride than get on ale! But I still spend lots of time with him and ride as much as I can manage so I'm sure he doesn't mind!
 
I have to make myself keep going this time of year. So I keep booking myself onto things or making arrangements with others which keeps the momentum up. I think if I just turned up at the yard every day with the choice of ride/don't ride I would probably not bother. I am more nervous about wind/dark etc but I tell myself this is my problem not Cally's and by the time I am on board I usually feel happier.
 
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I do the same as KP and make arrangements with others/have lessons or I wouldn't be motivated at all. I rarely ride on my own unless I have a dressage test to practise! I don't mind hacking out alone but would usually prefer to have company, and I'm on a big enough yard where there's always someone who wants to hack out.
 
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