anxiety

[jenren!!]

Ok as most of you will know im currently trying to get rid of my negative thinking and fill myself with positive thoughts and therefore improve my self-confidence. Well i have been working hard last night and this morning (i even tried meditating...) and i have really achieved this morning. I had a driving lesson at 9 and usually i feel shakey and really nervous (my 3rd lesson today) but today just after doing exercises i felt more excited than nervous and i felt MUCH more relaxed, and because of that mydriving lesson went fantastic .

I will keep working on it, but i find it quite difficult with Aramis. Last night i felt really anxious round her. It's not like she does anything, she stands there like a saint but i just feel generally anxious round her, and it's as if i feel i just want to turn her out and say 'thank god'. I find it really easy to talk about her to people and laugh about her when im not with her, but when im with her it's a different story. Obviously, i dont break down in tears or anything but i've got into a habit of feeling generally a little anxious round her. I've got it into my head that she'll be staying with me another year, as she's predicted to have bone spavin in her back left hock (which will be confirmed next week). I think it's partly her size, i am sooo confident with the smaller horses i handle and ride. Apart from that, i really dont know why.

Do you think if i keep doing my techniques and breathing and smiling etc will help me think differently about her or do you think it's just a 'clicking' thing which may never go away therefore its best to sell her? As you can tell im still debating whether to try again with her, but only because i feel i have to if im stuck with her. I wonder whether the anxiety is curable...

Just a thought i had, as you can tell i've still got a few negative thoughts sweeping my mind, it may take a while ...

Jenny xx

 

[Smokey2blue]

What makes you anxious around her? One of the downsides of this is that you make the pony feel there's something wrong. They are very sensitive and will pick up on the slightest thing. (When you're with her, try breathing very slowly and shallow. This relaxes you (forget deep breathing - that's old hat)! You'll find when you've done that for a couple of minutes, you'll feel very calm. Then, try holding the breath for the count of 2 or 3 then resume slow, shallow breathing again. They teach this at the hospital where I work and it seems very successful with patients, including myself).
Back to the pony. Has she ever done anything to make you nervous of her? Everything you do with horses/ponies must be positive as they need to feel secure with you.
Hope the above helps.

 

[teabiscuit]

it's worth a try Jen,
you won't lose anything by trying and you stand to gain

i try positive thinking but it's a hard habit to get into

i'm reading your posts about it with great interest, and it's inspiring me to be more positive

 

[Sammii]

I know this probably wont help but if you can figure out what it is that is making you anxious you will be one step closer to overcoming these anxieties. You'll be able to describe what it is and then how to prevent it. I do think the relaxation techniques are working and they are doing it naturally rather than you forcing yourself to relax which doesn't really work

Anyway, well done with the driving lesson, good luck with the next