Amazing week with Ben

Mary Poppins

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Oct 10, 2004
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It’s Thursday, I’m at work with loads to do and all I want to talk about is my horse. Not surprisingly, no-one here cares!

We have had an amazing week. Had a great lesson on Saturday where we maintained our outline in both rising and sitting trot. We managed to get extended trot and even did canter leg yielding. He was amazing – the best schooling session we have had.

On Monday I went for a hack with my RI and managed to trot the complete perimeter of the huge field with her - previously I was too nervous to venture up there at all. Her horse is much faster than Ben and although a sizable gap developed between us, Ben was not competitive and didn’t care about being left behind. I really enjoyed it and it made me realise how enjoyable hacking can be.

Last night I rode with a friend and we set up canter poles and some little jumps (less than 2 ft). Ben flew round them, jumped really well and after an initial refusal at the plank we managed to get over that as well. We then went for a walk round the huge field with my friend and apart from Ben trying to eat the grass, it was perfect.

The nerves are starting to reduce and after 8 months I finally feel like I am starting to get to know him. I love every second and am like a pony mad teenager who just cannot get enough. My poor husband patiently listens to me go on about him all the time. Just thought I would share my happy thoughts, better go and work now!
 
That's a great update!!!

It's fab when you start feeling like you're getting something productive out of your riding. I always remember feeling so much more secure once I'd learnt to ride in an outline, it really helped my nerves.

Really grinning for you as can totally empathise with how you feel :biggrin:
 
That's a great update!!!

It's fab when you start feeling like you're getting something productive out of your riding. I always remember feeling so much more secure once I'd learnt to ride in an outline, it really helped my nerves.

Really grinning for you as can totally empathise with how you feel :biggrin:

Thank you. It was great to hack with my RI. She said that most of my hacking confidence problems stem from me just not moving him on enough. He is a horse who likes to have a purpose and likes to be told what to do and where to go. When I sit and panic on him for stupid reasons (e.g. a plane goes by!), this is when he starts to nap because I'm not telling him what to do. At one point in our hack he started to do his little jumping on the spot because something moved in the bushes, but as soon as I put my leg and and told him we were moving forward he was fine again. Infact, better than fine. He likes me to lead him and TELL him what we are doing, rather than being vague.
 
A horse who wants clarity!

Well, now you now that and are happy to give it to him, there will be nothing to stop you.

What a fantastic post. I am in awe of your riding skills. Canter leg yield? Ziggy and I can't do any kind of sideways!
 
A horse who wants clarity!

I know! I feel like I have suddenly realised what I have been doing wrong all these years. I have always wanted to horse to look after me, but it turns out that the rider is actually supposed to dictate to the horse what to do. I tend to freeze whenever anything remotely scarey happens and cling on and hope for the best. It's hard for me to overcome this, but now I am starting to understand that Ben likes and needs this from me, it gives me the confidence to be a more positive rider. The trick is to think and move forwards at all times. He is so kind natured and a complete saint to put up with my rubbish riding so far.
 
What a lovely positive post! Indeed, when you reach the point where you feel like you can control and guide them through spooks etc it is great because once you relax and respond they do go much better. Its something I've discovered but had to work very hard to maintain because of course the temptation is always to let your own nerves kick back in.
So glad its going well for you. Totally understand about you needing to share too! When I am working - which is most of the time atm! Nobody really cares or is interested! Of course OH works with me but he is very much in the zone and focused on work (lets face it somebody has to be!! Lol)
 
I actually got a shiver down my spine reading your post - I'm so pleased for you! How happy and positive, I'm so glad you're enjoying your special boy just the way you should be. :dance::dance::dance:
 
I am ashamed to admit that im always slightly jealous of your updates mp, you put a lot of us to shame with how well things have improved and gone for you since you got Ben.
Swallowing the green eyed monster in me, I'll just say well done. I know just what you mean about being a pony mad teenager again, I could sleep breathe eat my horse (well not literally, I am a veggie after all!) I have to watch who I'm talking to at times incase their eyes glaze over!!!
Here's to many more weeks of boosted confidence and I'll look forward to hearing about the dressage And show jumping I'm sure you're about ready to start doing!!
 
Thank you for your kind words everyone. I really don’t want to make myself out to be some kind of expert rider because I certainly am not, I still feel like a complete novice most of the time. But what I am doing is developing a bond with my horse and enjoying him so much. I used to compare myself to the competition riders on my yard and I used to feel that I had to do what they did to ‘prove myself’. I have come to realise that although I don’t have their riding ability I have so much more fun than most of them, and get such a sense of achievement when I crack the little goals I set myself.

I am going to a dressage competition on 3rd August – only 2 weeks tomorrow. A friend is giving me a lift there and I am doing prelim 7. I don’t care what my result is, just as long as I don’t freeze and panic if something spooks him.
 
How lovely was that to read MP? What a fab time you are having with Ben, sounds like you two are really starting to gel, it is all about having fun and so impressed with the canter half pass!! Great news, good luck for the dressage
 
How lovely was that to read MP? What a fab time you are having with Ben, sounds like you two are really starting to gel, it is all about having fun and so impressed with the canter half pass!! Great news, good luck for the dressage

Thank you. I still can't believe he is mine. How lucky was I to find him as easily as I did? I don't really believe in fate, but we have both landed on our feet with each other. He had 7 owners in 3 years before I got him - I don't understand why but he is staying with me forever.
 
I have always wanted to horse to look after me, but it turns out that the rider is actually supposed to dictate to the horse what to do.

Yes, indeed - but being a dictator doesnt have to be out of line with your own character or love for Ben. Our RI sometimes compares hacking a horse to taking a toddler out on a walk? I like that.
 
Yes, indeed - but being a dictator doesnt have to be out of line with your own character or love for Ben. Our RI sometimes compares hacking a horse to taking a toddler out on a walk? I like that.

I like that! When I take my little boys out I always explain every noise they don’t like, if something scares them we stand back and look from a distance and if something interests them we also stop and see what’s going on. Overall I try and let them explore the world within safe boundaries – I’m always in charge but they can make some decisions themselves as well. Sometimes I catch myself calling Ben by my children’s names. Maybe I should imagine I have my boys with me and work out how I would act then?

I have got so much land to explore with Ben – we will have many opportunities to test this out!
 
Am so pleased for you MP, you and Ben are going great guns. Just such fab news:dance::dance:
 
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