Firstly hello and Merry Christmas
Milmin
You say you daughter loves her. Pony great start . I Lost my confidence after a fall and it took months to restore it but I regained it thanks to advice and support from NR forums. And my local supportive horse friends So it is possible
You have had some great advice re Rescue Remedy, perhaps getting another rider to give the pony more work. And joining pony club. Also get the pony rythim beads it can help spooky pony relax when ridden.
I have a question or two amd my bit of advice
you say the pony is spooky now does the pony get ridden alone ? Most ponies prefer to be ridden in company or with a foot soldier ie you walking alongside. Is it possible for a friend to ride with you daughters pony to give the pony confidence ?? secondly have you tried lunging the said pony before riding to take some freshness off the pony before grooming and ridden work ? and to get it listening to you via voice commands.
Now to you daughter I know what it feels like to have shattered confidence in a pony who was a saint before and after our fall ( not her fault at all a pheasant flew right under her. Any pony would have spooked at that.) if it was me I would lunge pony then groom and tack up so the pony is calm , give the pony and rider rescue remedy via drop on a treat for pony. Then if you daughter wants to get on and straight off that ok. It’s a massive step if she’s confident to walk on lead rein then do it if she only want to do 5 to 10 paces Then get off let her. Next ride she might just get on and off or do five pace before her confidence goes keep her within her confidence range don’t push her or put preassure on her. Not saying youI are by the way
baby steps at this stage she must be feeling very fragile at the minuet. Also buy book on ground work and help her work through. Some of the exercises for 2 reasons, the first it will build her bond and trust in each other again and help her relax while still loving her pony. Second she and the pony will benifits from ground work it’s not all about riding.
Next i would book a riding instructor who specialises in nervous or novice riders and is simpathetic to your daughters situation.
My last piece of advice and idea is giver her several month off riding altogether but maybe take her to inhand shows, horse agility classes with her pony let her see there is life without riding her pony and she can have fun without riding. I still did inhand etc when I was to fearful to ride. All helps with confidence.
Lastly even if she’s at the baby steps stage you and her join pony club and find a venues where horse events are held go watch lots of events pony club, show jumping dressage etc seeing other riders out there having fun might deep down in her encourage her want to ride and or one day compete again
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Good luck and if you need to chat come back to the forum there’s fabulous support here I know
It helped me when I lost my confidence.