WWYD? Sorry bit of a long one...


Gracie's mum
Jul 31, 2005
We bought a new car 12 days ago. Not brand new, it's a 10-plate Astra and rather smart. All black and shiny. I took it to the yard on Friday, was only there about 90 mins and before I left, I went to the boot and there was a big scratch/scuff down the boot that hadn't been there when I arrived....I know this categorically.

A few months ago I had a minor run-in with a volatile lady on the yard and we haven't spoken since and she arrived whilst I was round (out of sight) lungeing Gracie so I had my suspicions she might still hold a grudge. Yesterday morning I saw M, who had also been around on Friday and asked her if she saw "anybody" around the back of my car and explained about the scratch. She then said that her new horse had been titting around when she came back from her hack and had got close to the car.... and that she hoped it hadn't been her. I said I'd wait for Jen to get back from her weekend away and check the cctv. M then messaged me yesterday afternoon saying that if it did turn out to be her horse, she'd pay for the damage but that she didn't think she'd got that close. I said it was unlikely to be her because to scratch the car like that you'd have definitely been aware of contact and that surely she'd have come straight round to the school to let me know, that she wouldn't have to pay because accidents happen and it probably wouldn't be much to touch in a scuff/scratch. Besides, I added, we all take the risk of damage when we park our cars near the barns.

Well, the cctv showed irrefutably that it was her horse - he's stepped sideways and she caught the car with her stirrup. I was just relieved that it hadn't been done with malice by the other one!

I stopped at the local car repair/respray centre on the way home and he said they'd have to respray the whole boot and it will cost £200!!

Jen is adamant from the video that M definitely knew it had happened because she is looking down at my car as it happens and then turns to look again as she walks away. She reckons that after I innocently said that the scratch hadn't been there before and I'd driven straight to the yard and would check cctv, that M realised the evidence would be there, hence her messages yesterday.

Anyhoo, I've messaged M and sent her the vid, plus told her the cost. She straightaway apologised profusely and said she'd pay but I've told her that I'm happy for us to go 50/50 and pay £100 each but she's still insisting she'll pay the whole cost. Yes, her new horse caused the damage but it was only an accident and as I've already said, because the cars are all parked outside the barn we do accept the risk, so I'd be genuinely grateful to even get half!

My question is....if she does give me the full £200, do I accept it? I'd hate any ill-feeling on the yard. She's a nice lady, sensible sweet and kind and I'd hate there to be any ill-feeling.

What would YOU do? And how would you feel if it was your horse? Tbh, I'd probably be the same as her and offer to pay in full coz I'd feel terrible, especially if the car was someone's new pride and joy!



Well-Known Member
Jan 7, 2013
I would have offered to pay the full price too but I like you would think it was an accident and 50/50 is a fair way to cover it. If she is insistent on the full amount do you guys do anything as a yard for Xmas etc? Like going out? If so I'd say well ok but if you insist on the full amount of like to put 50% of it in the yard kitty fund if she won't accept it back.


Well-Known Member
Dec 20, 2004
Suffolk, UK
It is an accident but if it were me I would be insisting on paying the full amount because my horse caused it, I would not want you to be out of pocket at all, I'd just be grateful for your understanding.

Last year when I was leading Hank off of Jess and he was titting about not paying attention and trotted into the front of my neighbours car which was parked on the road, I was mortified to have to go and explain what happened and to arrange to pay for repairs but I did as soon as I got the horses back in the field. I got off lightly, neighbour laughed about it and there was no damage to the car.
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Cantering cabbage!
May 18, 2009
If she is insisting I too would accept and maybe buy her a small gift as a thank you for her paying up, a lot of people wouldn’t have been so gracious cctv evidence or not.
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Well-Known Member
Apr 23, 2009
Personally I'd get another quote - we know someone who comes and touches up scratches, he's mobile and used to work for BMW so he's good. He's touched up some of our scratches and you can't see the difference. I'm not saying it isn't right that you might have to have the whole boot resprayed, but I'd want to check first!
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Remember me?
Dec 21, 2011
Shetland, UK
Personally I'd get another quote - we know someone who comes and touches up scratches, he's mobile and used to work for BMW so he's good. He's touched up some of our scratches and you can't see the difference. I'm not saying it isn't right that you might have to have the whole boot resprayed, but I'd want to check first!

I wouldn’t unless she asks. It just complicates things. Schlepping round asking for quotes is time out of your day you probably could do without imho.


Well-Known Member
Mar 15, 2008
When mine broke a gate I offered to pay, luckily we had a spare.
But I still would have paid and left it at that.
I was/ am mortified if she breaks anything.

Mary Poppins

Well-Known Member
Oct 10, 2004
Visit site
I would take the £200 and get the car repaired. Why should you pay for her actions? If you don’t get on anyway, why would you want to pay 50% for her mistake? Especially as she didn’t own up immediately. It would be different if she had come round straight away and told you what had happened, but she tried to hide it from you and got caught out by the cctv.

KP nut

I'd rather be riding.
Dec 22, 2008
I'd accept the payment too. I would not hesitate to offer the full amount if it was the other way around.


Well-Known Member
Feb 8, 2012
She might want to pay the full amount because she feels guilty for not owning up to it and then lying to you. In which case I would accept and just say thank-you. If you get her a gift she will feel bad again, like she still owes you something.

Star the Fell

Well-Known Member
Jun 14, 2015
If I had done this to someone’s car, I would willingly pay for the repair, but would ask if I could get another quote myself. If the answer was no, I would still pay up but as others have said it’s always worth shopping around when it comes to car repairs.
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Grumpy old nag
Aug 5, 2009
I would offer the full amount too - but on the other hand for the sake of goodwill and sharing a livery yard I would probably just say forget the full 200 and go 50/50 as you say yourself it is parked at your own risk and a horse yard is pretty much a high risk area for inanimate objects I would think. Life is too stressful anyway to be playing the high handed righteous card with someone you will most likely come into contact very regularly with your shared passion for horses and chosen livery yard ...so No i would not insist on the full 200 but would go down the more diplomatic and friendly route of shared expense.


Gracie's mum
Jul 31, 2005
She's transferred £100 to my bank this evening and we are fine. I suspect she spoke to her husband and being a typical bloke he said "Don't insist on paying the whole thing if she only wants half!" I know Dom would deffo say this if roles were reversed as he is practical, sensible and isn't ruled by his emotions!! :p

I also suspect that she won't ride near the parked cars any more!!
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