Understanding hacking confidence issues

[Jane&Ziggy]

I read a fair few threads on this forum from people who find hacking challenging. I have always sympathised, but not empathised, because I couldn't really understand.

Then yesterday I was out on Ziggy and tried to ride with a different head on - a head that was thinking about, aware of risks. We had a pretty ordinary hack, but:

* At one point a stick scared him (d'oh) and he put in a showjumper's dirty stop, run backwards and spin from trot. I thought "Oh oh, out I go," but managed to haul myself back with my abdominal muscles from somewhere in the region of his brow band, got my stirrups back, patted him (he did stop when I asked), asked him to touch the stick and carried on.

* We weaved, as you have to on our heath, between and under trees. Branches could have taken my head off and tree trunks could have taken my leg off. He has good pony proprioception and has never graunched me, but if I was thinking that way I would notice each one of those possibilities.

* We went back by a route which he always finds a bit scary, and he did what he does when he is anxious, which is rush. So a walk down a narrow steep hill between trees became a trot until I could persuade him not to rush. I can easily see how that could be scary.

* Because I had made a tacking up error (see Bad bad bad Owner thread) he gave a little tiny buckette in the village when a car revved as it went past him. Most unlike him, and I can see how that would upset someone.

We were only out for 45 minutes and those are just the bits I remember. I felt when I got back that I really understood why someone who gave attention to risks would find hacking really scary. Confidence club peeps, I see where you are coming from, and I respect you for trying to conquer it!

I took that head off at once, I have to say, and hacked out bareback again this morning. It was lovely :wink:

 

[squidsin]

My hacking fears come from a bad experience out hacking - well, two to be precise, being bucked off and having to chase a horse down in the middle of nowhere. In one instance, she cantered the three miles home alone.

I think humans are much the same as horses; fear exists to keep us safe and once something like that has happened, it can take a lot of positive experiences to over-write the bad one. Not for everyone of course, but we're all different.

I can handle quite a lot from a horse, just not being bronced off. My hacking nerves are coming back - in fact, I am hacking tomorrow and not dreading it - which is good because I do feel it's something I need to be able to do if I'm to have my own horse again. They need variety. And, y'know, a lovely hack is a wonderful thing!

 

[Bodshi]

I can empathise, having previously loaned a horse with bad napping issues that I could barely get out of the yard. It wrecked my confidence for a while and although we did eventually get over the problem and I grew to love hacking anywhere and everywhere (maybe because it was such a big thing to get over those nerves) I still remember the butterflies driving to that yard and spending ages grooming and faffing about to delay having to get on.

Now hacking is my all time favourite thing and I'm quite happy to arm myself with a map, load up Raf and set off somewhere new all alone so we can enjoy a day hacking in the middle of nowhere. Which actually sounds downright stupid, but obviously I always tell someone where I'm going and have my GPS switched on my phone, and that tracking thing that tells you where the phone is. It's what I enjoy doing and I'll take the risk.

The difference is that I have a horse I know (so I'm pretty sure I know how he'll react in different situations and be ready to sit whatever shape he might decide to throw in that situation) and that I trust. Yes he can be a bit of an airhead at times, but I know he'll never lose the plot and mentally leave me. It makes a huge difference.

 

[sjp1]

Well, I always maintain that everyone is probably only a couple or rides away from a confidence issue.

I have backed youngsters and ridden them on til they were sold, had ex racers straight out of racing and everything inbetween.

What breaks your nerve is unpredictability.

I know Tobes is very spooky and fellow livery the other day said that I must be velcroed to him.

He also has an unpleasant broncing habit when he has a meltdown. What causes the meltdown is unpredictable.

A small kicking out and a bit of a spook is never a problem. It is the complete meltdown that is a confidence issue, and you are lucky Ziggy is not made that way!!

Having said that, fellow livery and I did a 10 mile fun ride and they were both very brave and very sensible, in spite of several scenarios that they could have had an issue with.

 

[Flipo's Mum]

On Saturday I jumped on my daft not been ridden often horse and went for a hack after about three weeks off. This would have terrified me a couple of years ago. Now I didn't even blink. I hope I never forget how big a deal it is to overcome hacking nerves. It is always based on previous bad experience or the possibility of bad experiences to come. But you've got to fight it if you're ever going to overcome it.

 

[Kite_Rider]

I have to agree with sjp. It is unpredictability that scares me. But I do tend to over think things to. My loss of confidence came from Oscar and started after my quite bad fall all though I didn't realise it at the time, I remember several hacks where he just went into meltdown for no apparent reason so I started trying to analyse what had happened to cause it and we just spiralled down from there. Belle can have her moments but I can tell when somethings coming and she is easy to deal with and sit to if she does spook so I don't worry and yes it does take along time to get that confidence back.

 

[Mary Poppins]

I think that it's lovely that you are trying to understand how us nervous nellies feel. Sometimes it's hard to understand if you don't have that fear yourself.

However, none of the things that you listed would have scared me because they were issues between you and Ziggy that you dealt with. When I ride and hack Ben, I don't expect him to be a machine - he is allowed to look and spook at things and this doesn't concern me. The odd jog or spook or buck are all over in a matter of seconds and I know that I can control him and he always looks after me.

What does bother me is all the things which are outside my control. When I see a person walking their dog in the distance, my mind pictures the dog running up to Ben and chasing him (I had a very serious phobia of dogs running at me when I was younger). When I hear a car or bike, I fear that they are going to run me straight down. When I see another rider I think that their horse is going to bolt with them and I am going to either have to help them, or Ben will go as well. When I ride through long grass I think that some random animals are going to fly up in my face. When we go through the woods I am always on the lookout for random deer or dog walkers. When it rains I worry that I will meet someone holding an umbrella. When I am hacking, my mind isn't clear and relaxed, it's full on alert for danger. I see danger everywhere and it makes me feel vulnerable and it means that I cannot relax. I transmit this to Ben and while he has never taken advantage, horses I have ridden in the past have misbehaved with me because I simply cannot relax and I wind them up.

I am well aware that it's all in my mind. I have never had a bad experience hacking Ben. He doesn't seem to be bothered about anything, but I have some serious issues going on in my head. Just recently I have found that I am wanting to change and I want to do some fun rides and long summer hacks, but I think that my fear of everything is too deep routed for me to ever overcome it. Ben gets huge variety in his work and we have big fields to ride round which I can happily do at all paces. I don't think that he suffers at all from not hacking properly, but I can't help feel like I am missing out of something.

 

[sjp1]

What does bother me is all the things which are outside my control. When I see a person walking their dog in the distance, my mind pictures the dog running up to Ben and chasing him (I had a very serious phobia of dogs running at me when I was younger). When I hear a car or bike, I fear that they are going to run me straight down. When I see another rider I think that their horse is going to bolt with them and I am going to either have to help them, or Ben will go as well. When I ride through long grass I think that some random animals are going to fly up in my face. When we go through the woods I am always on the lookout for random deer or dog walkers. When it rains I worry that I will meet someone holding an umbrella. When I am hacking, my mind isn't clear and relaxed, it's full on alert for danger. I see danger everywhere and it makes me feel vulnerable and it means that I cannot relax. I transmit this to Ben and while he has never taken advantage, horses I have ridden in the past have misbehaved with me because I simply cannot relax and I wind them up.

I am well aware that it's all in my mind. I have never had a bad experience hacking Ben. He doesn't seem to be bothered about anything, but I have some serious issues going on in my head. Just recently I have found that I am wanting to change and I want to do some fun rides and long summer hacks, but I think that my fear of everything is too deep routed for me to ever overcome it. Ben gets huge variety in his work and we have big fields to ride round which I can happily do at all paces. I don't think that he suffers at all from not hacking properly, but I can't help feel like I am missing out of something.

You will overcome it I am sure, and not because he is suffering, but because you have made great strides in lots of things you do.

And often things do happen, the fun ride we went on there was a dog leaping about in the undergrowth, and two mountain bikers decided to do massive noisy jumps at 100 miles an hour on a track next to the one we were on, and various other stuff, but it was all fine, horses didn't panic at all, and I would bet at shows that you go to, things happen out of the ordinary as well, and you take it all in your stride.

I am sure if you really want to, you will end up hacking quite happily, but you will do it when you are ready.

 

[Mary Poppins]

You will overcome it I am sure, and not because he is suffering, but because you have made great strides in lots of things you do.

And often things do happen, the fun ride we went on there was a dog leaping about in the undergrowth, and two mountain bikers decided to do massive noisy jumps at 100 miles an hour on a track next to the one we were on, and various other stuff, but it was all fine, horses didn't panic at all, and I would bet at shows that you go to, things happen out of the ordinary as well, and you take it all in your stride.

I am sure if you really want to, you will end up hacking quite happily, but you will do it when you are ready.

Thank you - you have more faith in me than I do!

I take Ben to loads of shows and clinics, and yes we do meet lots of unexpected things. We have ridden in crazy dressage warmup arenas, gone into dark indoor schools (which Ben is not used to), ridden in fields next to shetland ponies (which Ben hates!), attended jumping clinics at a yard directly next door to 500 cows with a bull staring over the arena fence, ridden in showing rings directly next to a dog show with 50 plus people watching etc. We have been to some venues to gale force winds and hail storms and I have never felt nervous.

But the difference is that all the shows (even the ones in huge fields) and in enclosed spaces. If something spooked the whole showground and all the horses took off in a mass stampeed, they can't go anywhere other than round the field. I feel safe when I have an enclosed boundary around me and I know that Ben cannot blindly bolt to where ever he may desire. However, on the other hand I do know that he wouldn't take off with me at all because I trust him completely. My hacking fears are irrational, and that's what makes them so hard to overcome. It stems from being bolted with 23 years ago when I was 14. I have never been able to escape the fear that I felt and since that incident I have never enjoyed a hack since.

 

[squidsin]

Thank you - you have more faith in me than I do!

I take Ben to loads of shows and clinics, and yes we do meet lots of unexpected things. We have ridden in crazy dressage warmup arenas, gone into dark indoor schools (which Ben is not used to), ridden in fields next to shetland ponies (which Ben hates!), attended jumping clinics at a yard directly next door to 500 cows with a bull staring over the arena fence, ridden in showing rings directly next to a dog show with 50 plus people watching etc. We have been to some venues to gale force winds and hail storms and I have never felt nervous.

But the difference is that all the shows (even the ones in huge fields) and in enclosed spaces. If something spooked the whole showground and all the horses took off in a mass stampeed, they can't go anywhere other than round the field. I feel safe when I have an enclosed boundary around me and I know that Ben cannot blindly bolt to where ever he may desire. However, on the other hand I do know that he wouldn't take off with me at all because I trust him completely. My hacking fears are irrational, and that's what makes them so hard to overcome. It stems from being bolted with 23 years ago when I was 14. I have never been able to escape the fear that I felt and since that incident I have never enjoyed a hack since.

I've also thought this about you MP - that you're so confident with going to shows and there's equally if not more potential for freaky stuff to happen there. But that's the thing with a phobia, they're not always rational - although they are a bit actually as fear exists to keep us safe. And if a dangerous thing happens it's not illogical for your brain to decide that you just shouldn't be in that position again, so it makes sense that it's difficult to train the fear out. In a sense, your survival instinct is a lot stronger than people seemingly more confident than you, and in our caveman days, you'd probably have lived the longest!

Anyway, I've just hacked out on Flash, the lovely Irish sports horse. Perfect hack, apart from a motorbike went by literally right behind us at 90 miles per hour just as we were turning off the lane onto a bridle path and he spooked, squealed and did a tiny rear and a buck! And then the horse in front kicked him! But actually that is OK (although obviously not ideal) as he wasn't hurt and he didn't try and bolt or take off. I'd rather know what they can do when something bad happens, and basically if it's not broncing or bolting, I can handle it. I think I was transmitting my nerves to him, too. Not sure I am ever going to totally love hacking though!

 

[newforest]

Having a cob who is a nervous/worry bod out hacking I have had to learn to read her pretty spot on. Get it wrong and i could set her back months. That's not easy as she is still young and I don't really know her out and about.
What I do know without hesitation is what she does before she does, but some situations are new to her so I don't know if she will react after her cues.

With hacking you can't plan anything apart from the route, you don't know what you will meet, though if you don't go out on a Thursday you won't meet the dustcart here.

Years back I read a book called Move Closer Stay Longer by Stephanie Burns, I would recommend it as it relates specifically to horses and riding. I helped two nervous nellies ride. One took 18months to get on the other a year. They are still nervous but its manageable.

I believe in bits size pieces and stepping a pinkie outside the comfort zone, not jumping in with two size sevens! Repetition, repetition, did I say repetition. Today I went in a field we have ridden in before, I had cues from her that this was a bit out of the zone for her, but in order for her to gain confidence we need to do this, its no different for us.

 

[sjp1]

Kind of related to small steps for humans, but small steps for horses, we have recently had some goats move to our yard (Sunday), and I haven't ridden since then as we did a fun ride, and I was tired!!

I know for a lot of less sensitive horses, goats are not an issue, however, Tobes was terrified of sheep and cattle, but then had to share with both and now is fine. Cats he is getting better with, but I could actually hear his heart thumping when he saw them, and the yard cat annoyingly mews at him which causes great consternation!

So today, after bringing him into the yard alone for supper, rug change etc., the man who is renting the annexe always brings the goats in to go to bed and milks one of them.

I decided Tobes might as well see the goats - as he is going to have to see them tomorrow when we ride as they are in a field down the track.

Armed with cauliflower leaves, I grazed him til the chap came up the track and then asked him to look. He was stiff with fear, and his head was a hundred miles in the air, but I managed to cram a cauliflower leaf into his mouth which he had to chew, and then another and then another!!!

After the goats had passed, he immediately returned to grazing!!

I definitely agree that for both horses and human confidence, small manageable steps are the best way forward, and I think getting through a little bit of fear (ie., horse does a bit of a buck and doesn't turn into rodeo horse, or horse is very forward but doesn't bolt), builds your confidence for the next thing that comes along.

 

[sjp1]

Thank you - you have more faith in me than I do!

I take Ben to loads of shows and clinics, and yes we do meet lots of unexpected things. We have ridden in crazy dressage warmup arenas, gone into dark indoor schools (which Ben is not used to), ridden in fields next to shetland ponies (which Ben hates!), attended jumping clinics at a yard directly next door to 500 cows with a bull staring over the arena fence, ridden in showing rings directly next to a dog show with 50 plus people watching etc. We have been to some venues to gale force winds and hail storms and I have never felt nervous.

But the difference is that all the shows (even the ones in huge fields) and in enclosed spaces. If something spooked the whole showground and all the horses took off in a mass stampeed, they can't go anywhere other than round the field. I feel safe when I have an enclosed boundary around me and I know that Ben cannot blindly bolt to where ever he may desire. However, on the other hand I do know that he wouldn't take off with me at all because I trust him completely. My hacking fears are irrational, and that's what makes them so hard to overcome. It stems from being bolted with 23 years ago when I was 14. I have never been able to escape the fear that I felt and since that incident I have never enjoyed a hack since.

Being properly bolted with must be horrible, and I can absolutely understand why that has stayed with you.

Maybe you should do one of those courses where they make you change your perspective on what happened? If you are a person who visualises things, which I think you are as you play a movie in your head as to what can happen, it might help a lot. I can't remember what the different kinds of people are called, but I am one of those who has to actually do things to change them. So for me, I think well, the new story isn't actually true so it makes no difference, but I do know for people who visualise, it really does work. Might be worth a shot?

 

[Jane&Ziggy]

Being properly bolted with must be horrible, and I can absolutely understand why that has stayed with you.

Maybe you should do one of those courses where they make you change your perspective on what happened? If you are a person who visualises things, which I think you are as you play a movie in your head as to what can happen, it might help a lot. I can't remember what the different kinds of people are called, but I am one of those who has to actually do things to change them. So for me, I think well, the new story isn't actually true so it makes no difference, but I do know for people who visualise, it really does work. Might be worth a shot?

I think you're thinking of NLP (NeuroLinguistic Programming) techniques sjp1. They can be very effective.

And MaryPoppins, I can imagine how it feels to be in that place, but I am glad I am not. I sympathise!

 

[sjp1]

I think you're thinking of NLP (NeuroLinguistic Programming) techniques sjp1. They can be very effective.

Thats exactly what I am thinking of, I just wish I could remember all the names for all the different types of people - so irritating getting older!!

 

[Mary Poppins]

Being properly bolted with must be horrible, and I can absolutely understand why that has stayed with you.

Maybe you should do one of those courses where they make you change your perspective on what happened? If you are a person who visualises things, which I think you are as you play a movie in your head as to what can happen, it might help a lot. I can't remember what the different kinds of people are called, but I am one of those who has to actually do things to change them. So for me, I think well, the new story isn't actually true so it makes no difference, but I do know for people who visualise, it really does work. Might be worth a shot?

I have kind of thought about it, but I'm not sure that it would help. At the end of the day, riding is a dangerous activity and I'm not sure that anything anyone could say to me would stop me thinking that a bolt could happen again - because it could very well happen again.

I can still remember the day it happened like it was yesterday. I was on a riding holiday with a friend and we were riding out in the evening because it had been too hot during the day. We were coming back to the yard after a lovely 2 hour hack. I was riding a jet black pony called Minstrel who was cheeky but controllable. As we headed onto a huge stubble field Minstrel started to try and overtake the ride and I had to turn lots of circles. The RI said that Minstrel had a habit of running off at this point and it would be wise for me to swap onto her horse.

I did as she asked, but the second I put my foot in the stirrup of the RI's horse, it spooked at something and took off at full gallop across the field. I had no stirrups because they were far too long for me, and I tried everything to stop this horse to no avail. We were headed straight for a main road with buses and lorries going along it, and about 10 yards before we reached the road I jumped off the horse. I remember feeling that I was going to die on the road and had to make the decision to risk injury by throwing myself off at gallop, or face being hit by a lorry on the road. Luckily I wasn't hurt, but the fear I felt that day has never left me. I have never been so scared in my life again since.

Sometimes I wonder how on earth I got the nerve to get back on any horse again, but I rode the very next day. I think my parents told me that they had paid for the holiday so I had better bloody well enjoy it!

I would love to get over my fear, but I really don't think that I can.