I'm considering moving my pony to a new barn but I would really like some advice. Get ready for a long story!
When I was 8 years old, I lived in a different house and right down the road was a barn. I rode there because I could walk there and the horses were much better cared for than the horses and most other commercial barns. The lessons weren't great but the location was perfect. The instructor, Raul, only sometimes taught. He would usually sit in a chair in the ring and chat with whomever he could.
Then 4 years ago, we moved and the old barn was too far away. So I started at a new barn and bought my first horse, a 3 year old Thoroughbred named Monty. We felt badly about leaving Raul so I would ride there once every two weeks or so and we didn't tell him about Monty. Eventually, I stopped riding with him so I'd have more time with Monty but it turned out that buying a young horse was a mistake. My new instructor was afraid of him and treated him roughly to show him "who was boss" and I wasn't a competent enough rider to handle him. We did everything possible to make it work. I love Monty so much. My mom figured out that the instructor was ruining Monty so we moved him to Raul's barn. He was really nice about it and welcomed us right back in. He was able to make Monty gentle and sweet again but I couldn't trust Monty after all we had been through. The final straw had been when I took Monty to a hunterpace and he took off galloping and bucking and I landed on my head and knocked myself out. For obvious reasons, I was really nervous about getting on him after that.
So since it wasn't going to work out with Monty but since he had been through so much, we decided to donate him to Green Chimnies, an organization similar to Pegasus. We figured that he was so gentle that he would be able to help the children there. But the people who ran the organization didn't know how to care for a young horse and he lost 300 pounds in a month and started biting people. He was underfed and miserable. So we took him back to Raul's barn. But I was still afraid to ride him. And it was a 45 minute drive from my house to the barn so it wasn't practical.
My mom adored Monty so she wanted Raul to take care of him even if I couldn't ride him anymore. For about 8 months, Raul took care of Monty and I started riding at a new barn, one that was only 7 minutes from my house. There I bought a new horse, Tiramisu, and I had a blast. Stupidly enough, I had once again fallen in love with a young horse and he was manipulative and mean. After 8 months of abuse BY this horse, we decided to sell him and go back to Monty. But T wasn't sellable. He had major separation anxiety and was terrified of being outside the ring. Not good for an eventing horse. So my new instructor gave him to a friend of hers who runs an eventing sale barn in Maryland. It's been many months and he couldn't sell T so he passed him onto a friend of his who runs a foxhunting sale barn. His reasoning was that T should be ok outside the ring if he's with other horses. But this new lady can't sell him and she says our last option is to give him away.
By this time, we had brought Monty with us to the barn where my first instructor had moved. It was still about 45 minutes away from my house but it was in a different direction. Raul needed an assistant instructor so he brought in a girl named Emily. Emily was the sweetest person I have ever known. She was so caring and fun to be around. But then she got engaged and was planning to move to Colorado with her fiance. So we offered Monty to her because she loved him. But she couldn't take him because she couldn't afford to keep him. Then Raul brought in a new instructor named Teicia who wasn't as nice as Emily. She was a really aggressive rider and was also kind of rude. She never said please or thank you when she asked, or told, someone what to do. But she was a good rider so we gave her Monty to take with her to college. (A major bone of contention is that she never said thank you for that.)
Then Raul decided to find me the perfect horse and he did. He found Walter. But he still doesn't teach. He still sits in the ring and talks to other people. Or he rides his own horse and trains that horse instead of giving me a lesson. My mom and I have both tried to get a lesson out of him. The record is 20 minutes! It's supposed to be an hour lesson and the most teaching I have ever gotten from him is 20 minutes! It's incredibly frustrating. The only reason I'm still with him is because he saved Monty and because he found Walter. But those are pretty major reasons. And we're (my mom and I) not sure if it's morally okay to leave him for this. On one hand, it's a "business relationship" and if my mom is paying for my riding lessons, he should actually teach. On the other hand, it's not just a "business relationship". He saved Monty and he found Walter. He also saved me because Walter is the only thing keeping me from going back to a hospital. And he knows this because my mom had to explain to him why I wasn't riding and where I was for 5 weeks. And many weeks before and after that when I wasn't in the hospital but I still wasn't eating "normally" enough to ride.
So now I really want to move Walter to a barn close to my house where I know the instructor and the barn. I never officially rode there but it's on the same property as the barn where I kept T and Barbara, the instructor where I want to move Walter, used to let me work for her in exchange for lessons and riding time. She is a lot of fun and during several lessons, I actually fell off from laughing so hard. I know that moving to her barn would be great but I still don't know what to do about Raul.
When I was 8 years old, I lived in a different house and right down the road was a barn. I rode there because I could walk there and the horses were much better cared for than the horses and most other commercial barns. The lessons weren't great but the location was perfect. The instructor, Raul, only sometimes taught. He would usually sit in a chair in the ring and chat with whomever he could.
Then 4 years ago, we moved and the old barn was too far away. So I started at a new barn and bought my first horse, a 3 year old Thoroughbred named Monty. We felt badly about leaving Raul so I would ride there once every two weeks or so and we didn't tell him about Monty. Eventually, I stopped riding with him so I'd have more time with Monty but it turned out that buying a young horse was a mistake. My new instructor was afraid of him and treated him roughly to show him "who was boss" and I wasn't a competent enough rider to handle him. We did everything possible to make it work. I love Monty so much. My mom figured out that the instructor was ruining Monty so we moved him to Raul's barn. He was really nice about it and welcomed us right back in. He was able to make Monty gentle and sweet again but I couldn't trust Monty after all we had been through. The final straw had been when I took Monty to a hunterpace and he took off galloping and bucking and I landed on my head and knocked myself out. For obvious reasons, I was really nervous about getting on him after that.
So since it wasn't going to work out with Monty but since he had been through so much, we decided to donate him to Green Chimnies, an organization similar to Pegasus. We figured that he was so gentle that he would be able to help the children there. But the people who ran the organization didn't know how to care for a young horse and he lost 300 pounds in a month and started biting people. He was underfed and miserable. So we took him back to Raul's barn. But I was still afraid to ride him. And it was a 45 minute drive from my house to the barn so it wasn't practical.
My mom adored Monty so she wanted Raul to take care of him even if I couldn't ride him anymore. For about 8 months, Raul took care of Monty and I started riding at a new barn, one that was only 7 minutes from my house. There I bought a new horse, Tiramisu, and I had a blast. Stupidly enough, I had once again fallen in love with a young horse and he was manipulative and mean. After 8 months of abuse BY this horse, we decided to sell him and go back to Monty. But T wasn't sellable. He had major separation anxiety and was terrified of being outside the ring. Not good for an eventing horse. So my new instructor gave him to a friend of hers who runs an eventing sale barn in Maryland. It's been many months and he couldn't sell T so he passed him onto a friend of his who runs a foxhunting sale barn. His reasoning was that T should be ok outside the ring if he's with other horses. But this new lady can't sell him and she says our last option is to give him away.
By this time, we had brought Monty with us to the barn where my first instructor had moved. It was still about 45 minutes away from my house but it was in a different direction. Raul needed an assistant instructor so he brought in a girl named Emily. Emily was the sweetest person I have ever known. She was so caring and fun to be around. But then she got engaged and was planning to move to Colorado with her fiance. So we offered Monty to her because she loved him. But she couldn't take him because she couldn't afford to keep him. Then Raul brought in a new instructor named Teicia who wasn't as nice as Emily. She was a really aggressive rider and was also kind of rude. She never said please or thank you when she asked, or told, someone what to do. But she was a good rider so we gave her Monty to take with her to college. (A major bone of contention is that she never said thank you for that.)
Then Raul decided to find me the perfect horse and he did. He found Walter. But he still doesn't teach. He still sits in the ring and talks to other people. Or he rides his own horse and trains that horse instead of giving me a lesson. My mom and I have both tried to get a lesson out of him. The record is 20 minutes! It's supposed to be an hour lesson and the most teaching I have ever gotten from him is 20 minutes! It's incredibly frustrating. The only reason I'm still with him is because he saved Monty and because he found Walter. But those are pretty major reasons. And we're (my mom and I) not sure if it's morally okay to leave him for this. On one hand, it's a "business relationship" and if my mom is paying for my riding lessons, he should actually teach. On the other hand, it's not just a "business relationship". He saved Monty and he found Walter. He also saved me because Walter is the only thing keeping me from going back to a hospital. And he knows this because my mom had to explain to him why I wasn't riding and where I was for 5 weeks. And many weeks before and after that when I wasn't in the hospital but I still wasn't eating "normally" enough to ride.
So now I really want to move Walter to a barn close to my house where I know the instructor and the barn. I never officially rode there but it's on the same property as the barn where I kept T and Barbara, the instructor where I want to move Walter, used to let me work for her in exchange for lessons and riding time. She is a lot of fun and during several lessons, I actually fell off from laughing so hard. I know that moving to her barn would be great but I still don't know what to do about Raul.
