'New Horse' dilemma....help me decide

Kis Vihar

Kis Vihar

Nutty Saddlers !
Feb 14, 2008
6,706
1
36
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Norfolk, UK....or Hungary!
www.bespokebrowbands.com
OK, I've decided I want a horse to ride again. Will NEVER give up looking for our 4, but I miss having something I can hop on and hoolie round the countryside on, do a bit of schooling (and jumping) on, etc.

Now...I've been offered a horse on 'loan' by a friend of mine. I know the horse - he was on livery with us last year. I like him a lot...and he's Ingrid's nephew.

BUT...He's a stallion, which means he'd have to live on his own, not with the herd. He's started schooling, but has NEVER hacked out! :eek: His owner said she'd like him to come here, as we get on well, and she'd like him to have the attention. She'd already mentioned about him coming here for summer livery anyway.

At the back of my mind, I'm wondering - is she using us for free livery and training? Will she let me work him for a summer, then take him home for winter?

I want to hack out - What if he is difficult - My hips are too weak to deal with something that messes about.

But....I like the horse and he'd be mine to ride.

I really don't know what to do. Deep down, he's not what I want...but then again....maybe...
 
Perhaps just have him and see how it goes? What the harm? If he isn't suitable then u could give him 'back' to her - whether that's stay at yours on livery or actually go back to her? Perhaps it might be a good short term solution and then if she does have him back next winter then you can buy something for yourself?
 
to be honest, i don't think he sounds right, stallion - difficult management - never hacked out - which is what you want to do - and you are concerned that you might put time and effort into him and then off he goes again with your investment.

i can see the attraction of knowing him already and having a bit of background on him - difficult decision really
 
juliecwuk said:
Perhaps just have him and see how it goes? What the harm? If he isn't suitable then u could give him 'back' to her - whether that's stay at yours on livery or actually go back to her? Perhaps it might be a good short term solution and then if she does have him back next winter then you can buy something for yourself?
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This is the problem. Last summer he was here on livery. It was sometimes not the easiest thing in the world to get livery payment, :rolleyes: and despite the condition that his paddock MUST be poo-picked at least once a week, it was done TWICE in 8 months!!! :eek: By 'done' I mean she picked out 2 wheelbarrows of poo. The field was left in a hell of a state. It was also agreed that the owner would visit at least once a week, (with livery money!) and to poo-pick and check in with us. Sometimes we didn't see her for 4 or 5 weeks at a time. His owner works a summer and winter job. In summer she has no time for this horse, in winter she takes him 'home' and rides him every day.

If he came here and it didn't work, I fear we'd be stuck with him on free livery, as she'd say she couldn't afford to pay livery fees, and would have no-where else for him to go in summer, as nowhere will take a stallion. :(

It's difficult. I like the horse...but as D&T said, I want to hack, and he's never hacked out. The fact he'd take up a seperate field is also bugging me slightly. :(

Argh....!! I have a week to decide if I want him. :help:
 
If its something u want to peruse how about a tight knit contract to make sure she can't just take him at the drop of a hat?!
 
chickflick1066 said:
From what you've written so far K, my gut instinct is to walk away but what's your gut saying?
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Paul and I have discussed it. Both our guts are saying 'no' right now. :( I feel I will be stuck with a horse I feel obliged to ride rather than a horse which I would be excited about riding. Although he's gorgeous, and stunning to look at, I wouldn't choose him as 'my' horse. The 'never hacked out' thing is an issue too. He's also never been ridden with another horse, and I'd like to have something I can ride over to our friends' place on and ride with them.
 
I'd be siding with no too Karin.

I think you've thought about it long and hard already and know its not what you want.

I'm sure the right horse will come along...they always do
 
From what you've written KV, I'd say you run the opposite risk - that you'd be lumbered with a horse to look after with no income, not that he would be taken away. And a contract is difficult enough to honour in this country, let alone abroad. Sorry Dannii, not trying to slate your suggesiton, just my opinion.
It would be the perfect arrangement if both of you were equally gaining from the situation, but sounds like its going to benefit her more than you. There must be other options, I really feel for you KV and hope something turns up.
 
I really feel for you too KV, but you have already answered your own question I think, 'deep down he's not what I want' if he's never hacked you never know he may be fine but if he's not ..... not to mention the other little niggles you have, go with your gut hun... as Sparklie said the right horse will turn up x
 
Well.... I'm *hardly* the one to comment on head-ruling-heart judgments :)redface:) but I agree with the masses that although it is tempting, I don't think having him is the right thing for you.
 
I was kind of relieved when I read your " NO" post. I do not believe it would be a good arrangement for you. I do not think you can really trust the owner of the stallion judging by your previous experience. She sounds like a person who would do whatever suited her best, and not really care or respect your feelings/needs. It's so likely you would end up with him taken away when the winter comes after you've invested a lot of work and time with the horse (not to mention the emotional attachment).

Your horse will come along, Karin. I am sure of it. Am keeping my fingers crossed for it to hurry up! :)
 
Go with your gut feeling. To many if's but's and maybe's for my liking. I know you really want a horse. Sometimes you have to be patient and wait for right horse, very frustrating I know. On the other hand, you could arrange to take him for a week or so on the strict understanding that he goes back if all don't work out.
 
My thinking, no! had nothing to do with the horse.
But based on her previous behaviour and your relationship with the owner. Sharing depends on trust between rider and owner. Which means you have to rely on them to do what they say they will.
No share horse is ever the perfect horse - they are real individuals all with their quirks, limitations and possibilities. And by riding them, we all to some extent school them and exercise them thus benefiting the owner - though we do it for our own benefit and pleasure too.
But the trust between owner and sharer has more to do with human character than with fine riding. I have no aspirations or status as a rider. But two people on NR let me visit and ride their horses. Being trustworthy, thoughtful, practical is the basis of a good share.
And this owner didnt show herself to be any of these things. Even if she had the perfect horse, you might need to say No.
 
I think this is very good sense, Skib - it's true that a share involves the owner as much as the horse, and, tempting as it is, KV, I agree with what everyone else has said: better to wait until the right horse comes along.

Just a thought, by the way: would it be possible for you to go and ride this stallion sometimes without actually having him on loan? Perhaps just schooling him initially? How far away is he?
 
LindaAd said:
I think this is very good sense, Skib - it's true that a share involves the owner as much as the horse, and, tempting as it is, KV, I agree with what everyone else has said: better to wait until the right horse comes along.

Just a thought, by the way: would it be possible for you to go and ride this stallion sometimes without actually having him on loan? Perhaps just schooling him initially? How far away is he?
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Not practical, sadly. He's over 2 hours drive away. :(

It's going to be a 'no'. :( The whole 'previous experience' and the management issues is putting us off. Something else will come along in due course, I am sure.
 
Having ridden out with a amorous gelding, my one experience of one is.... some one shouted, " Quick! move your horse forward!" to me, and as I turned round to see why, the exciteable boy was just getting down off my horse........... my horse is a gelding.........
That's just something I wouldn't want to risk happening..
 
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