Nearly came to fisty cuffs at the yard tonight

OwnedbyChanter

With out my boys life would be bland
Apr 16, 2009
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Raininghamshire
Long story so I will keep as short as I can.

before Christmas I was riding Ginger when I commented that he was so slow and I could see why he was an Ex racer when one of the other ladies yelled out you should try xxxxx horses. I yelled back 'no way their mad' while laughing

This is nothing that I have not said to her in jest and a lot nicer than most of the yard have said about her horses. Nothing more said.

Last night I was riding Ginger when one of the girls came up to me and saying that I was the cause of a facebook (arrggg) argument. Someone had told the owner what I had said she took it as me slagging her off and bad mouthed me all over the internet. This was challenged by a couple of friends and she delete the comments. I never saw it.

I have to say I saw red:devil:, How dare this kid bad mouth me talking about being slagged off behind her back then post it on the net that I am a (insert you own bad words here) cow and if I have a problem speak to her face. OK that's fine if I had said anything at all and if I had I would of said it to her face.

So I called her and told her that I don't have the time or the motivation and to soddening old to bad mouth her or anyone else for that matter and that she needs to think about her actions. She put the phone down on me. Then sent a text saying we will talk at the yard.

So tonight I got to the yard and went straight round to talk to her. I have to say my energy level was high but the first words out my mouth where I believe we need to clear the air. she tried to tell me that she put nothing on facebook about me. The girl that told me was stood there and said that I knew what was put on as she told me!!! we exchanged a lot of heated words and her mother (who is not a small lady) joined in. It got a little nasty (I did not say anything horrid just stuck to the facts).

She was getting really nasty and screamed at me 'if you don't shut up I will thump you' well I have no idea what she thought I would do but I just stood there and said in my best voice 'go on then' on the next breath she was saying to her mum. I'm messed in the head tell her to go away.

Oh dear. I hate bullies and that is what they are I just don't think they expected that reply or someone to stand and have it out with them.


I got home to night to a text message from her mother saying sorry.

That has just topped an already :poop: week
 
Facebook has such disruptive power - why I don't do it. But, you stood your ground, stuck to the facts and ended upon the higher ground by the sounds of things especially with an apology on your return home.

Accept the apology, ignore the issue it has been and gone and there are more important things in life right now. And anyway when things have gone badly they can only get better....
 
Can I be completely inappropriate here and say my money's on you in a fight no matter how big this other lady is, And go you, I'd have loved saying that to her.

I guess you have to apply the rule here - would these remarks bug you in six months time? If the answer is no, best just leave it. Life's too short as they say.
 
^^^^^This with big fat knobs on!!! You work in the military for goodness sake!! Well done you OBC. And you even got a apology. That's very impressive and a great result. Not nice for you to have to go through though.

Treat yourself to something nice tonight! (((Hug)))
 
Ugh the same happened to me at my old yard, it's awful isn't it poor you. You were alot braver than me, in the end hubby who was fed up with me coming home from the yard faced up to her. It was Xmas eve, everyone was helping each other with their horses, drinking wine and generally having a nice time. She came in and bitched off at me, can't even remember what about, anyway hubby lost it and went over and told her bully's had no place there. She tried to answer back but he got right in her face, plus he's 6'5" and she almost started crying. She made a complaint about him after that and asked to get us removed from the yard but didn't suceed. Complete bitch. You did the right thing, I should have done the same alot sooner. It's awful though whatever the outcome, why do people have to be such bloody idiots.
 
Well done you! I would have done the same and you have cleared the air.

I have had similar issues with FB in the past as I think so many of us have. Hopefully she will have learnt her lesson:smile:

Confrontational stuff is never nice, but its a whole lot better than simmering over things imo.
 
Can I be completely inappropriate here and say my money's on you in a fight no matter how big this other lady is, And go you, I'd have loved saying that to her.

I guess you have to apply the rule here - would these remarks bug you in six months time? If the answer is no, best just leave it. Life's too short as they say.

I'm with FM and LWTB!
 
Thank you guy. I reply back saying 'what has been said is now over, I don't hold grudges and it will not be mentioned again by me'

It is hard to take the higher ground when all you want to do is punch someone or at least give a couple of home truths.

OH was quite proud as they are not really nice people. In my head they needed someone to stand up to them as they are bullies I should have gone to the yard owner but I prefered to try and deal with it myself.

I was bullied all the way through school badly, In the last year I something snapped and I swore I would never be bullied again. This is why I guess I am so harass now.
 
Just posted on your QOD thread but I was the same, bullied unmercifully until I snapped and then left alone after that. I believe you get treated in life how you expect to be treated.
 
Thank you guy. I reply back saying 'what has been said is now over, I don't hold grudges and it will not be mentioned again by me'

It is hard to take the higher ground when all you want to do is punch someone or at least give a couple of home truths.

OH was quite proud as they are not really nice people. In my head they needed someone to stand up to them as they are bullies I should have gone to the yard owner but I prefered to try and deal with it myself.

I was bullied all the way through school badly, In the last year I something snapped and I swore I would never be bullied again. This is why I guess I am so harass now.

Good for you!

I can fully empathise, having also been bullied then snapped. Sounds like you've dealt with it in the best way you could have done.
 
Oh OBC well done hun, such a horrible situation to deal with- and blatantly the daughter lost it as she was guilty and wanted to stop all of her stirring and nastiness coming out for all to see.. And clearly even her own mother felt bad for her behaviour as she apologised , and so she should have!!!!
You did completely and utterly the right and proper thing- not necessarily always the easiest thing!!! I think your very brave for standing your ground and I hoped I would have done the same In your position tho sadly I don't think I would have kept as calm or poised!!! I too was bullied all through primary school, I too snapped one day, but now if someone starts to show bullying behv towards me or someone I love the red mist descends very quickly and I find it hard to remain calm:/!!!!! you were completely in the right tho, stuck to the facts and yea as flips mum said, my money would be on you the whole way if it came to it, no doubt In my mind;)!!!! Hope your feeling a little better today hun x
 
Nothing to add to what's already been said - so sorry to hear that "adults" can say and behave the way they do - why on earth do they have to be like this? Good for you for standing your ground. It is horrid though, specially as you go there to ride and enjoy your lovely boys.
 
I think facebook has a lot to answer for - it absolutely stuns me how much of peoples private lives they put on there!!

I can't see that you did anything wrong at all - in fact when a fellow livery told me when Tobes was lame that I could ride hers if I wanted, I said she must be joking and I wouldn't have him if he was free!! She just laughed - she knows what he is like, but loves him anyway - and she knew I wasn't being horrible about him anyway.

Incidentally, the girl who told you is a bit of a stirrer isn't she?!!

You were absolutely right to clear the air - yards eh!
 
Its not Facebook that has a lot to answer for, its people. Some are just plain thick and there's nothing that can be done about that.

I announced my intention to get a boob job and tummy tuck on Facebook as I want to be as open (keep wanting to say upfront!) as possible so there's no whispering or thoughts that I'm trying to hide anything. Can't get much more personal than that!
 
Think it's really good you were the better person! Altho better person or not i would defend myself in any situation the same if I needed too.

What a horrible thing to have to deal with when your also so tired. Just remember your horses are your pleasure n enjoyment. Sounds though that they might not let it lie as easy as you have seeing as their knickers got in such a twist in the first place over a simple comment, nor do they seem to be adult about it n talk it through :/

Internet sadly in general can have a lot to answer for, so many ppl waiting on your every word or using it to sound off. Surprisingly the ones that talk a good game are the ones that back right off when face 2 face.... Funny that huh :wink:

Take care of yourself n try and have some relax / chill time this weekend
 
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