Mind playing games with me

[Dizzy Woo]

I have recently had to start working 5 mornings a week and my bestest hacking bud can only ride mornings, so it's solo or nothing most of the time now :unsure:
I have tried to tell myself this is a good opportunity to have some 'me and daisy time' and have been out round the (still) scary farm a few times. When I get back I think "phew" whereas when I get back from a hack with a mate I feel exhilarated.
Anyhow this afternoon I had planned a quick plod round the farm thinking the more I do this the easier it's going to get, but I felt so tired and kept looking for other things to do and then texted bestest hacking bud to tell her I was feeling down and so tired and that my extra hours at work were not beneficial to my horsey hobby. She replied that she had felt the same that morning as she had to go out alone as I was at work, she encouraged me to go out, said I would feel better once I'd done it :unsure:
I had deliberated so long it was getting late but decided to go for it and buddy was right I felt so much better after, I wasn't tired at all when I got back, a bit of a "phew" but also a bit of exhilaration, it was IMO my lack of confidence trying to persuade me not to do it and lying to me, telling me I was tired
Bloomin head, plays havoc with the riding, why does our confidence have to be so fragile, or is it just my nutty noddle?

 

[Flipo's Mum]

Yep know what you mean mrs, it sucks doesn't it! I guess now you know though, so next time you feel (or think you feel) this way, go anyway!
Glad to hear you're getting out and about with Daisy x

 

[Trewsers]

Tell me about it! Lol, I kid you not, I can go from being able to take on the world with my riding to a jelly legged clutz who can barely do rising trot without looking as though I am going to cut the blood supply off in my pony's side through gripping on so tight!! Ridiculous. Today my confidence was really high and we pootled in the sunshine then did some trotting, not even the leaves falling off the nearby overhanging trees startled us, nor when she rubbed her nose on the fence post and dislodged a stone and it plopped down startling both us and the crows - not once did I mind. And the dry stone waller creeping about in the next field behind the school, that didn't bother us either. Bonkers! Yet tomorrow I could be silly again and do the death grip. Mad.
If only I could just be full of my own self confidence all of the time.........
Sorry, rattled on a bit there.....................but I know where you are coming from!

 

[Cortrasna]

Pre-empting what might happen when you hack out is actually more exhausting than actually dealing with whatever happens isn't it? I have often found this - my adrenalin levels would get higher and higher as I prepared to get on and ride and leave me feeling all exhausted and limp and not prepared to do it at all!

On the other hand, if you do manage to persuade yourself to get on and do it, and all goes much better than you thought it would - well the exhilaration and euphoria when you get back from riding can only compare to the high from class A drugs. That opinion is only based on hearsay not personal experience of drugs, I hasten to say!:redcarded:

 

[Trewsers]

On the other hand, if you do manage to persuade yourself to get on and do it, and all goes much better than you thought it would - well the exhilaration and euphoria when you get back from riding can only compare to the high from class A drugs. That opinion is only based on hearsay not personal experience of drugs, I hasten to say!:redcarded:

:giggle: I know what you mean about that - it's as good as the first cigarette after a cold lager (well better actually).

 

[Dizzy Woo]

Bonkers! Yet tomorrow I could be silly again and do the death grip. Mad.
If only I could just be full of my own self confidence all of the time.........
Sorry, rattled on a bit there.....................but I know where you are coming from!

I don't do the death grip, I do the leaning further and further forward and 'holding on' with my reins:redface:

 

[Cortrasna]

I don't do the death grip, I do the leaning further and further forward and 'holding on' with my reins:redface:

Ah the 'fetal position' - I became an expert with this riding technique when I had JJ - It has taken me nearly three years of owning and riding Dolly to cure myself!:redface: That is also a death grip IMO - but it takes forever to convince yourself that you are actually exasperating the problem rather than helping it by curling forward.

Just concentrate on how well you did today....considering how badly you were feeling about it all, I think that took some courage to actually get on and go out by yourself.:biggrin:

 

[Tina2011]

I know exactly what you mean. I wish I had the answer and a definite cure all. I think the only thing you can do is keep trying.

I do wish there where more psychologists that specialised in 'riding nerves'.

All of the psychologists I have ever met seem to look at me a bit strange when I mention horses lol.

My latest hacking buddy is training to be a psychologist though so, hopefully she can make me an excellent 'case study'.

 

[Trewsers]

It's funny though isn't it - I wonder how many "normal" people (ie, not horsey!!!lol) understand the whole riding nerves thing?! I often mention to non riders that certain things make me nervous about riding, or situations and they look at me like I'm a martian or something - they just don't "get" the fact that it can be scary! I think they just assume you get on and ride. Well, that would be a nice idea wouldn't it.................

 

[sjp1]

Well, you are brave going out alone - full stop.

I reckon I can go one better than that though - weekend before last I went on a 10/12 mile fun ride. All over fields, tracks, bit of road work, loads of cantering and galloping, horses passing us, and I coped with no problems at all, and no nerves, but slight irritation at people galloping past out of control!

Last weekend, I went out with two other liveries, because it was soo wet ground wise, we stuck to roads, and I could feel myself getting slightly worried as Tobes gets very wound up by one of the liveries horses ............ WHY???? As it happened another livery is HUGELY nervy, although her cob is saintly, so was too busy having to babysit her to worry about myself too much, but still - really???

I do sometimes wonder about myself!!

 

[Mary Poppins]

I don't do the death grip, I do the leaning further and further forward and 'holding on' with my reins:redface:

Oh yes, when my nerves kick in I do the leaning forward. Sometimes my bum comes right out of the saddle and I am kind of perching in my stirrups with my reins short and leaning forward. Yes - gallop position! Thankfully Ben has got to know me so well I can see him rolling his eyes and saying 'come on you stupid woman - you don't actually think that I am going to do anything other than plod along do you??'.

 

[sjp1]

Oh yes, when my nerves kick in I do the leaning forward. Sometimes my bum comes right out of the saddle and I am kind of perching in my stirrups with my reins short and leaning forward. Yes - gallop position! Thankfully Ben has got to know me so well I can see him rolling his eyes and saying 'come on you stupid woman - you don't actually think that I am going to do anything other than plod along do you??'.

You are very very lucky he is so saintly!!!