dont know if this affect anyone else but I realised today after 5 years of riding that I dont classify myself as a real rider! I always refer to myself in a negative way in terms of riding, always look at others and think if only I could ride properly etc, the moment of clarity came after my first solo hack in 18 months .. my horse span and cantered for home after some very scarey ponies appeared from nowhere, I managed to stop him, and turn him back round and walk on. I used to think this kind of thing only happened to me cos I couldnt ride properly, and that real riders wouldnt experience it! Today, FINALLY I realised that it happens to everyone and I got my horse over it, maybe Im a real rider after all! Just got second solo hack to get out the way now!