Hello, and some advice on if to buy my own horse...

Aug 12, 2006
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Derbyshire
Hi All, I used to be on this forum many years ago I'm not sure if many will remember me but I'm back so I just wanted to check back in to say Hello, and also get some advice and words of wisdom.

Basically, my story is; Mid teens I sold all my last pony due to my Mum passing away. Since then I've always worked long hours and if I'm completely honest getting another hasn't ever interested me up until this point.

I'm 26 years old, no children, I have my own house with my partner, no plans on children anytime soon. I've recently started a new job which means I'm home for about 3/4 everyday Mon-Fri with 1 day working from home a week. (Great I know:p)I suffer on and off with my metal heath and I always have since I lost my Mum, nothing serious but I do lack motivation massively which I'd say has worsened in the last 2 years, I have absolutely no interest in anything, I have no hobbies. I do have friends and do I enjoy socialising, but other than that I really don't do a great deal. I have a partner, but we don't do all that much other than spent time at home, we also have 2 dogs that are literally like our children so we spend a lot of time looking after them and walking.

Most mornings, weekend or weekdays I really struggle to find the motivation to get out of bed. I snooze my alarm probably 7 times and wait till the latest possible moment to get out of bed. After work all I feel like doing is getting on the sofa and napping, or watching tv. I know it bothers my OH, to the point he tells me it'd not healthy and regularly encourages me to do things, but if I'm honest I just cant be arsed. I'm so uninterested in anything.

I've put a lot of thought into it and I do think having my own horse would solve possibly a lot of this, I.E Getting me out of bed in the morning, something to do after work, exercise, socializing, a bond etc... However I am also worried it could have the opposite effect.

I'm absolutely terrified of the commitment I'm not going to lie, I refuse to pay Full/Part livery so I would be going DIY which would mean twice a day eevvveeerrryyyday :oops: but I really feel like it would do me the world of good. My days spend as a teen with my ponies are honestly some of the BEST memories of my life, but I do find as adults its common to try to cling to childhood memories that used to bring joy, but it's just not the same anymore. I'm going back for riding lessons starting tomorrow to ensure its still something I do enjoy doing and I will make a decision from the back of that, but I'd love to know other peoples thoughts on how their horses have helped them in life whether that's with mental health or something else. My partner thinks its a great idea and is really supportive of it, he even said he will help out in the evenings and weekends.

I know some people may suggest a loan or share - completely agree and I think it'd be a great idea, but I cant find anything ANYWHERE! The kind of pony I want (school master, confidence giver) I feel are so difficult to find, even to buy never mind loan or share! Also I do like things doing my own way so I'm just not sure it'd work...

Look forward to catching up with you guys and hearing your thoughts

Elle xxx
 
Hi, welcome back :)

I think getting back into horses is a great idea but you hit the nail on the head there at the end, I would strongly suggest a loan or share initially, you never know your riding school might be willing to hook you up with a weekday share once they have met you or can perhaps put you in touch with someone, word of mouth is often the best way to find what you want :)

Owning horses is great and I think it does wonders for mental health but I cannot imagine the shock to the system of napping on the sofa most days to suddenly doing twice daily yard visits and hard graft, and as we all know 10am at the weekend just isn't acceptable so even on your days off you still have to get up at the crack of dawn otherwise it is the horse that suffers. And not wanting to do things someone else way is a pretty poor excuse, it's been a while since you had a horse, there is going to be a lot for you to learn/relearn and sharing will give you the chance to catch up, see it as a positive opportunity not as a negative because it doesn't suit you. I do get it, I don't share well, but I'd rather that than going though all the stress and effort of buying a horse only to find out a few months later it isn't the magic fix I was hoping for and then having more stress and the emotional turmoil of having to sell up.
 
Hi, welcome back :)

I think getting back into horses is a great idea but you hit the nail on the head there at the end, I would strongly suggest a loan or share initially, you never know your riding school might be willing to hook you up with a weekday share once they have met you or can perhaps put you in touch with someone, word of mouth is often the best way to find what you want :)

Owning horses is great and I think it does wonders for mental health but I cannot imagine the shock to the system of napping on the sofa most days to suddenly doing twice daily yard visits and hard graft, and as we all know 10am at the weekend just isn't acceptable so even on your days off you still have to get up at the crack of dawn otherwise it is the horse that suffers. And not wanting to do things someone else way is a pretty poor excuse, it's been a while since you had a horse, there is going to be a lot for you to learn/relearn and sharing will give you the chance to catch up, see it as a positive opportunity not as a negative because it doesn't suit you. I do get it, I don't share well, but I'd rather that than going though all the stress and effort of buying a horse only to find out a few months later it isn't the magic fix I was hoping for and then having more stress and the emotional turmoil of having to sell up.

This is what I wanted to say but couldn't find the words. It isn't always a fix and it would be a shame to find that out after making the decision to buy.
 
Can you go to a local RS and have a few hacks? Maybe that would re-ignite the bug, and help you know if it's what you really want. Also, I can't really say that I love all the jobs that need doing (poo picking, fencing et al,) but if that bug DOES resurface, you'll not mind those, because it's a chance to get close to your pal, and should make it a joy, not a chore.
 
I would definitely do something to get you started. A riding school is a possibility - if you haven't ridden for so long you'll probably be a bit rusty anyway. Then you can go around the neighbourhood looking for yards, since if you do get a horse you'll need somewhere to put it! And who knows, talking to people around and about might well turn up some possibilities for sharing or loaning. Lots of people never advertise their horse, just wait for the jungle drums to bring someone to them...
 
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Can you go to a local RS and have a few hacks? Maybe that would re-ignite the bug, and help you know if it's what you really want. Also, I can't really say that I love all the jobs that need doing (poo picking, fencing et al,) but if that bug DOES resurface, you'll not mind those, because it's a chance to get close to your pal, and should make it a joy, not a chore.
Sorry, re-read original post - you're already set to go to a riding school, should read properly before I open my gob! :rolleyes:
 
Once you get that bug back and remember how amazing ponies can be and then you are ready to take that plunge then do it.

Just to add I am on diy with Theo horses and a pony it is not twice a day every day forever. It depends on your set up and your ponies needs.

I learnt long ago that I’m the summer I go up before work at six and fly spray by nine the spray doesn’t work so a rug and mask is better so for the last three years I don’t go up
In the morning. That said I on a good yard and if there was a major issue they would call me. But on three years nothing.

I am also not one for listening to the crowds I bring in for winter when I think it is needed (to me it’s about the fields they are horses nothing a rug can’t fix) .

I start to go up twice a day when I think it’s to warm for a rug during the day but needs one at night (below 5)

A horse is as hard as you make it
 
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