Feeling mean

diplomaticandtactful

Well-Known Member
Apr 25, 2003
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Our neighbours are having a horse pts today. They say they can't bury it in their field and ask if they can bury it in our field. they have a large field, it is steep, I can see it is difficult, you may have to dig deeper and pay more.

but I have 2 horses and 2 donkeys buried already. I have 8 here. at some point Aimee will go, and sadly my Buddy. Our field also slopes and there are wet areas where you wouldn't want to bury as it is not suitable. We also have pipes for water going through it.

I feel mean but they have 8 horses and if I say yes to this one, then the next time. Plus it's going to make a right mess of my field.

I just wish they hadn't asked.
 
Just say that you’re very sorry, but no, they have their land and if they can’t have the horse buried there they need to make other arrangements, if you feel you have to justify your decision, which you don’t, tell them you need your land for your horses when the time comes.
 
Erm, why would they have asked? surely you bury them on your own land to keep them close or to rest at home, not sure why you would want to bury them on someone elses other than its probably cheaper than cremation. I wouldn't be feeling bad about saying no, I think it's weird they asked.
 
Just say that you’re very sorry, but no, they have their land and if they can’t have the horse buried there they need to make other arrangements, if you feel you have to justify your decision, which you don’t, tell them you need your land for your horses when the time comes.

that's what we did, but just wish they hadn't asked
 
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Ok well in that case, stop beating yourself up about it. You are not responsible for anyone else’s feelings but your own x
 
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Erm, why would they have asked? surely you bury them on your own land to keep them close or to rest at home, not sure why you would want to bury them on someone elses other than its probably cheaper than cremation. I wouldn't be feeling bad about saying no, I think it's weird they asked.

our top field backs onto theirs, theirs is very steep with only a small flat bit at the top, I can see it is difficult, and the bit at the bottom where it is less steep has land drains which have broken so it has a wet area. we have some flat areas but like them there are bits you wouldn't want to use.
 
our top field backs onto theirs, theirs is very steep with only a small flat bit at the top, I can see it is difficult, and the bit at the bottom where it is less steep has land drains which have broken so it has a wet area. we have some flat areas but like them there are bits you wouldn't want to use.
I get that, still seems a weird favor to ask, to me.
 
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I would say no. It could have repercussions for you with all the rules there are on burial now. If there ground isn't suitable then they need to make alternative arrangements.
 
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There's a dead horse under a tarp so she is gone.
I'm lucky in that the YO has said I can bury Ramsey next to his friend , her horse. However, if she hadn't offered, I'm not sure I would have asked, I'd probably have gone for cremation. Put it out of your mind if you can, you've been perfectly reasonable.
 
I'm lucky in that the YO has said I can bury Ramsey next to his friend , her horse. However, if she hadn't offered, I'm not sure I would have asked, I'd probably have gone for cremation. Put it out of your mind if you can, you've been perfectly reasonable.

I know I have, it's just a strange thing to be asked out of the blue. It's not something I would ask someone. I have two of my friend's cats buried in my garden, but she visits and she was between homes and wanted them to be safe
 
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My first horse was cremated.
I wouldn't worry about it, move on they will likely get someone to remove.
She was all in one go.
 
Had fun and games last night as went to get Buddy and Fleur in just as a digger came to take the body away. Our two were very spooked and were up far corner of field usually they come flying down. So trudged through the mud up the hill to get Buddy down, he was all of a jitter. Fleur wouldn't come so up I went again. She was really good, every time she got excited I just said wait and gave her halt aid and she stood. She has remembered all her training and is so calm, very impressive for a youngster who is fiery. So instead of 10 minutes to get everyone to bed it took nearly an hour.
 
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