Do we need?

[newforest]

A please no critique section or a please critique section?
Just a musing.

For me the forum is about sharing viewpoints and giving a snippet insight into our individual world's.
I like to read a discussion-a meeting of different views. This is now one of my problems.

I now feel I can only join in if I agree or am seen to be supportive with a thread/ post. I don't feel I should scroll on by and ignore if I have something different to say?

Some of you will think my question of a section pointless, in which case you can write that.

 

[carthorse]

I don't think so, after all people can always start their posts with PLEASE, NO CRITIQUE. Otherwise my feeling is that if you put something up for general viewing you're opening yourself up to comments & if someone is so fragile they can't handle anything less than gushing praise then maybe they shouldn't post. I don't think anyone on here gets nasty or unreasonably critical, in fact I'd say people are sometimes very restrained in their comments or just don't reply.

 

[Kite_Rider]

For a long time now I’ve declined to comment on certain threads. Better to keep my mouth shut than risk saying something however well intentioned that will be seen as criticism is how I’ve felt. I’m quite ballsy in real life and have few reservations about saying exactly what I please, so why it bothers me here I don’t know, maybe it’s because on a forum the written word can and is often misunderstood, no body language, no voice or facial expression lead to much misunderstanding.

 

[Trewsers]

Trouble is in the past I have seen threads started and the poster writes "please no critique" but it almost makes them sound as though they are expecting some and being defensive. (Which I know isn't s crime lol up to them). I don't know really - if I think something might attract unwelcome attention then I don't post. This forum is polite and friendly. I happened to come across a different horse one and some of the replies to s person asking about pts their horse was just blunt didn't cover it!!!

 

[Cortrasna]

Brilliant idea I think for some- can see some people would use it with almost every post. Personally I wouldn't use it and would not even bother to engage on a post that says PLEASE, NO CRITIQUE. What is the point in even posting on forums if you dont welcome comment and sometimes an answer or viewpoint that doesn't necessarily agree with yours, in my world that is discussion and sharing knowledge and is the whole point of joining a forum and using it.

I have seen an undercurrent on here in recent months from some sectors trying to turn NR into a fluffy bunny "Oh arent you/your horse/ your ideas just wonderful". Just to clarify I love the proper fluffy bunny posts seeing lovely pics of members horses and storys of their everyday lives...but it has to be recognised that this is a horse forum and therefore questions will be asked and opinions given whatever the subject matter......if we don't allow that frank exchange of ideas and opinion to continue this wouldn't be the first forum to disappear off the radar when the PLEASE,NO CRITIQUE sector becomes the accepted norm. That would be a great loss I think.

 

[domane]

Maybe we should have a debate section where we can post things that might be controversial.

 

[Cortrasna]

Maybe we should have a debate section where we can post things that might be controversial.

Good idea in theory but trouble is those who really, really cant take any critique and view it as unjustified response or rude or whatever their current grip might be, are so up themselves they can't for one moment accept that their opinion and viewpoint might be questioned by others, so basically they wouldn't use it. On the other hand people like myself would probably never post anywhere else, given how unpopular and how disliked most of my opinions are!

 

[newforest]

It's interesting to read that I am not the only who feels restrained and therefore ignore threads.

 

[Jessey]

I don't think it's necessary to have a no critique section. I don't think any constructive criticism should be restricted, but I have seen several instances where criticism is not constructive nor relevant to the question/post and I don't see why that is necessary. I get saying what you think and everyone being entitled to an opinion, I just think there is ways and means to say it and that isn't about being a fluffy bunny, but it doesn't hurt to put things in a nicer way, we have no idea what else is going on with people beyond what they write here.

 

[mystiquemalaika]

There are always going to be those of us who are blunt, outspoken or rude, however it's seen and those who get offended by you saying hello. Welcome to the world of the internet. Enter at your own risk and if you don't want an opinion then don't post, or just be really grown up and mute or block everyone who doesn't agree with you. Quite simple really.

 

[Cortrasna]

In a fair and perfect clairvoyant world that would be great @Jessey - to avoid upsetting people who might have other things going on in their own lives would be a nice thought, but if we base anything we write on that possible scenario then not much of any value or interest would ever get written on here?

And I have to say I have posted on here over the years with some pretty horrendous stuff going on in my private life but I would be horrified to think that if people suspected or knew any of that they would pussy foot around anything I write and treat me and my opinions with kid gloves!

It is worth remembering I think, that we have lost many extremely knowledgeable and interesting posters/members over the years that were sometimes rather blunt and dogmatic with their viewpoint but very, very informative and always up for a good well informed and sometimes controversial debate. And a good few of those were stalwarts on here long before you or I ever set foot on the forum Jessey. A huge loss IMO and there are very few on here now that I have that much respect for, and I think very often the few remaining ones (not myself here you understand) with anything of much note to add to a topic are treated very rudely and often just ignored completely - and yet another poster can post the exact same opinion and suddenly it is a wonderful idea??? But I guess at some point they will also give up and stop posting - most opinion on here is now almost predictable in its careful and banal wording so as to boost their own perceived idea of being reasonable and well liked.

 

[Trewsers]

I don't think it's necessary to have a no critique section. I don't think any constructive criticism should be restricted, but I have seen several instances where criticism is not constructive nor relevant to the question/post and I don't see why that is necessary. I get saying what you think and everyone being entitled to an opinion, I just think there is ways and means to say it and that isn't about being a fluffy bunny, but it doesn't hurt to put things in a nicer way, we have no idea what else is going on with people beyond what they write here.

That is so true about not knowing what's going on in people's lives beyond a forum. Once or twice I've taken things maybe worse than normal because of dealing with personal sh*te at home

 

[orbvalley]

I have definitely become more restrained on here lately - by which I mean I don't reply to certain threads if I think the poster is sensitive. I don't consider my posts to be deliberately aggravating but I do now avoid commenting and even asking questions to certain posts as I get the impression some members aren't open to debate or discussion without getting offended. I guess thats the way of the world though

 

[newforest]

People use the forum for different reasons. I guess if you do not want a discussion, don't get involved in one- least of all start the thread.
We do have the block facility, there are those in real life I walk by.

What about @domane idea of a debate area? Nobody appears to want the critique.

 

[Trewsers]

There was once a suggestion for an anon facility, ie folks could post anonymous questions. Not sure how I replied to that one. In theory I kind of liked the idea, because you'd get honest (if blunt ) answers.

 

[newforest]

There was once a suggestion for an anon facility, ie folks could post anonymous questions. Not sure how I replied to that one. In theory I kind of liked the idea, because you'd get honest (if blunt ) answers.

I started that thread because I guess I wanted to discuss yard things. But I didn't want what I was saying to be making me identifiable.
But it has been talked about previously.
https://www.newrider.com/threads/its-been-asked-for-before.247551/#post-3005235

 

[Cortrasna]

What about @domane idea of a debate area? Nobody appears to want the critique

I would love a gloves off no whinging and moaning good old fashioned debate section, but as I replied to @domane there are still far too many people who post things totally oblivious to the fact that their post might cause debate and adverse comment as they feel anything they post is beyond discussion and just not open for debate as they are always RIGHT! lol! so those will forever remain outside the debating area won't they and turn into the usual stropping off and accusations of the 'playground', 'dont say anything at all if you can't massage my ego', don't be nasty to me (sniff, sniff) etc. etc. so not really sure it would solve the problem too much, as only those open minded and mature enough to actually discuss pros and cons of topics etc. without taking it personally would use it. Those ones are a bit in short supply over recent months though aren't they?

 

[carthorse]

I guess the best we can do is try to abide by it if someone specifically asks for no critique, and it's best if they start the thread with that. If the thread raises something interesting then take it to it's own thread to discuss & the ego can stay away if they want. Do people actually expect to be treated so carefully in real life?

 

[mystiquemalaika]

I guess the best we can do is try to abide by it if someone specifically asks for no critique, and it's best if they start the thread with that. If the thread raises something interesting then take it to it's own thread to discuss & the ego can stay away if they want. Do people actually expect to be treated so carefully in real life?

Yes, yes they do. Mind I find alot of them say they like people who are upfront, that is until you are up front with them. Then of course you are just a female dog

 

[Cortrasna]

If the thread raises something interesting then take it to it's own thread to discuss & the ego can stay away if they want.

I did try doing exactly this on a very recent thread that was causing some controversy, and as it had spiked my interest in certain aspects of that thread I did take my question elsewhere deliberately to have a debate away from the very sensitive poster of the original thread, as I knew full well any comment from myself generated by their thread would go down like a lead baloon and would be far from the acquiescent agreement and validation they were obviously hoping for.

Unfortunately it did not work because some posters chose to follow onto my new thread and try to drag it back to the very thread and poster I was trying to avoid commenting on and get away from! ..I believe some of the terms @Jessey and @Orenoko in particular used actually brought unpleasant and unnecessary overtones and frankly detracted from the whole subject matter I was discussing - however, I guess for some they would class all that ridiculous and childish posturing as debate but not what I want to see on any useful discussion to be frank.