diary of a nervous novice's lessons

Woohoo! Tonight I was in a lesson on my own and I rode Lady - OFF THE LEAD REIN - for 45 minutes! She is very, very forward going and easily stressed. For the first half an hour I didn't put my legs on at all. I didn't do a fantastic job - she was a bit joggy at times because I was a bit tense - and I only trotted in a 20 metre circle around Julie (who can relax both me and Lady with her superb 'don't panic' vibes!) but I did serpentines and circles in walk around the school - on my own. And I managed to get her back to walk within a few strides even when she jogged. And a few times she put her head down and relaxed for a minute or two.
I know it doesn't sound like a big deal - but I am feeeeling goood!
 
My RI is clearly on a drive to push me just that bit further than I want to go. Tonight I was on Chester. And we jumped the first ever non-cross pole I've ever jumped and a tiny tiny spread. I was a mess but Chester carried me over. He isn't like Kas though - who would jump correctly with a sack of potatoes on top of him. I did feel like I had to do some work (which scared me as I don't know how to jump!)
Then I managed to get him on the correct leg on left rein for the first time ever. It was the lift and squeeze on outside rein that did it I think - but then he went ping at a hundred miles an hour! As instructed I sat still and tried to follow him! And then both horses cantered together (back on his good leg). So I went to the lesson tired and tense and spent a fair bit of it whining at being pushed too much - BUT - now I feel great. A great RI is one who knows just how far to push me!
 
Well done Sophie!! I missed your last update as my subs ran out, I remember when they got Lady and she was a tricky girl, so massive pat on the back for you!!!

Hope you're feeling really pleased with yourself as already your diary shows you coming on in leaps and bounds :biggrin:
 
Less pleased with myself in last nights lesson. Just the two of us again, I was on lovely schoolmaster Kas and the other girl was on a wizzy nervous pony. RI wanted me to act as lead file for wizzy, nervous pony. Kas (despite having legs twice his length...) was not keen to trot as fast as wizzy pony wanted. Wizzy pony kept trying to cut past on outside of Kas. I was not doing a good enough job keeping kas close to the wall so that wizzy pony couldn't. Also Kas was clearly a bit peed off with having wizzy pony right up his backside!

I coped just about, and the other girl coped fantastically with wizzy pony. And after a while Kas sped up, pony calmed down a bit and the gap between us grew to more than a centimetre... And after a while longer wizzy pony went in front and all was well although he did canter off a few times (but his rider coped well) But I hate the feeling of a 'horse crush' - I really start to feel panic stricken whether I'm behind or in front. I think it freaks me out more than anything else. Not very logical I know, does anyone else feel like this? Normally I circle away - but I obviously couldn't as was under strict orders to help the other rider out by staying where I was!
 
Don't be hard on yourself! Ok, so you may feel a bit disappointed that you weren't as cool as a cucumber the whole time...but playing buffer to a wizzy pony isn't something that happens on every lesson, in my humble opinion, that is more something that people learn to do when they have their own horses or work on a yard where there are young/nervy horses being brought on. So the fact that you did it at all is something to be pleased about.

This is just a personal opinion thing, but in my experience the RS where you are learning doesn't always do things "by the book", now whilst this has it's disadvantages (it wouldn't be entirely unreasonable to say that it was a little unfair to put you in that situation on a lesson you are paying for), it also has its advantages in that you do get some exposure to situations that are a little non-typical of other Riding Schools, it's usually only by being in these situations that you learn to be confident in them.

Personally, I found that learning in that environment I was much calmer in the sharing/owning horses stage and have always been able to deal with stressy situations quite well. I'm not saying that it's always the best way to learn or that everyone should learn this way, but it had some long term benefits for me.
 
Thanks bitsnpieces. It is an interesting point you make. Every now and again I do wonder about going to get lessons in a riding school with less 'quirky' horses etc. But I always reject the idea because I do love Aldersbrook and Julie knows me well and has helped my riding enormously. Also I am such a wuss I think I do need to be (within limits!) put in more difficult situations so that I gradually learn to cope with more. And generally I trust Julie to know my limits. I do sometimes wish they had more 'schoolmaster' types but you can't have everything...
 
I'm back after a long gap. I had to miss two lessons due to work. Tonight I found I was really nervous going to the lesson - had to give myself a good talking to, to stop myself chickening out altogether. Not sure why - bit knackered, under pressure at work, not been for a couple of weeks.... Also Julie pushed my boundaries in my last few lessons and I just felt I couldn't cope with that tonight. So I told I was feeling scared and to give me an easy ride, which she did. Afterwards felt a bit of a wuss - but I think I need to know I can have an easy week if I need one. I told her to go back to normal next week - but no major new challenges for a week or two please!
 
Don't beat yourself up, Sophie33. Sometimes it's good to back off a bit and step back within familiar boundaries. Your own body and brain telling you there's too much else going on in your life to cope with being challenged. Confidence is too precious to risk by not having an easy session once in a while.

Riding isn't all about constantly getting up the 'ladder of progress'. Enjoy it and take your time. Taking a breather from tackling harder horses or exercises isn't chickening out, everyone needs an easy ride once in a while!:wink:
 
Thanks Selside - you are right of course! I felt like a chicken last night - but I do ride to enjoy myself after all!
 
Hey Sophie33, I do like following your progress as you do seem so much like myself.

Whenever we have a lesson where we've been pushed out of our comfort zone, we always get a a treat the following week and get to choose a horse that we love riding and usually get to do an exercise that we love (e.g drill).

There's nothing wrong with having an easy ride, it gives you a fun lesson and a remeinder as to why you go riding :happy:
 
Thanks N_J, I really like the idea of getting a reward after being pushed out of our comfort zone - I might mention the idea to my RI. And I am glad you enjoy my ramblings, cos I always read your updates. You are obviously more advanced than me (counter canter - very fancy!) but it is so nice to read about someone else's lessons. Hope your flu is on the way out...
 
Hey Sophie33, I do like following your progress as you do seem so much like myself.

Whenever we have a lesson where we've been pushed out of our comfort zone, we always get a a treat the following week and get to choose a horse that we love riding and usually get to do an exercise that we love (e.g drill).

There's nothing wrong with having an easy ride, it gives you a fun lesson and a remeinder as to why you go riding :happy:

This with knobs on!!!!! Everyone needs a break from the challenges now and then!

Sometimes the feeling of overcoming challenges can be addictive, so it makes you feel worse when you aren't in the right frame of mind to face them...but it's perfectly normal :)
 
Opinions please!

This is a bit of a mad post, I need saving from myself. Today I was down helping out at my RS for an hour before work. I asked my RI about how the new horse is doing, who belongs to a livery and has ring worm, the poor love.
She started telling me that the owners may decide to sell her, and then said 'so if you want a horse'....
I asked her some more and she told me that:
1) She is young (6 I think) but is a sweetheart very trusting of people and 'sweet as a nut' to ride. She also said she was straight from ireland and had some problems - for example with picking her feet up - but RI thought all she needed was some tlc and time to settle in.
2) She might be in foal!

I asked if the school would buy her if owners decided to sell and she said they might try and convince the schools owner to buy her or the instructors might 'club together'. Clearly my RI is soppy about the horse and wants to make sure she has a good home.
On my way out I went around the corner to have a look at said mare (I hadn't even laid eyes on her at that point). She is a lovely little piebald cobby - about 14'2 I'd guess - just the kind of horse I dream of!

So I went off to work in a daze - seriously annoying the other drivers when my horsey dreams meant I didn't notice the traffic had moved and the road was clear!

So - this is all a big if - after all the owners may keep her. But - to be realistic - I do not have enough money pay the full costs of owning a horse. And I do not have enough time either.... But my dream has always been to have a horse on working livery (I know lots of you don't approve for good reasons...but I think it would suit me). So I am seriously tempted to text my RI and say that if she was up for sale i would be interested in discussing buying her on that basis - or maybe buying a part share of her.
Of course I couldn't possibly cope with a mother and foal - so if she is pregnant that would rule it out I guess...
Oh I don't know - its insane - I haven't even touched her (because of the ringworm) just chatted to her over the stable door. But it is wrong to put out a tentative enquiry....
 
Sophie - Sometimes these things happen and you have to go with the flow, especially tempting when the actual horse is there for all to see and known at the yard where you ride. I have been in a slightly similar position over a RS horse which may be for sale and I find myself swinging wildly from one extreme to another.
Mixing the Christmas cake today I even asked myself whether I really wanted to Wish for a Pony?
I guess that is the real question for you too - Do you truly want to own a horse just now? Are you able to afford it and will you get enough benefit for the extra money?
If the answer is a possible yes, then like me you have to weigh this particular horse against the other horses which are out there on the market and you could select for yourself. Which may be fitter - health wise - and just as nice to ride. I know from scanning the ads for a few weeks that it shouldnt be impossible. I almost impulse bought one last week.
If you are buying a first horse there are lots of reassuring things about buying it through people you know and having the ongoing support of the yard where it will live. But against that - I want my independence.
You talk of sharing. I too would look for a weekend sharer - but the RS didnt seem too happy about that.
And if I buy a horse, I want to be free and able to sell it again. So you too need to know who chose this horse over in Ireland and have a whole lot more info about it? A horse is a commodity with a market price.
I havent come to any decision, because like you say, there are a lot of unknowns - a lot of things other people including vets may decide or not decide. And which currently may not be answerable.
You ask about putting out a tentative enquiry? I decided not. I havent said anything for weeks. In another month or two some of the answers may be plainer. But I also havent asked because just expressing an interest might encourage an owner to sell, or to raise the price asked. And might dissuade the RS from making an offer? Many RSs act as sort of agents - buying and selling ponies to and for students. It feels kind, but it is also their business.
I do know that if I dont buy this particular horse - I can still go ahead and buy another, and I could buy another with full help from the various RIs and schools I know. Net-working is important - but it should never confine you to just one single horse.
 
Thanks Skib - very sensible and thought-provoking points. I think I am going to sit down tonight and make a list of hard headed pros and cons about making my tentative enquiry....
I know what you mean about RS's buying and selling, including my own. In this instance (because of how well I know the RI and also because of what she told me about the horse's current situation) I think she is being kind rather than being governed by any ohter considerations. BUT, even so she is being kind to the horse not me! That is very commendable of her, but I know I musn't do this just to help the lovely horsie if it isn't the best thing for me to do...
 
Well - I didn't make enquiries - because look at it hard-headedly I really don't have the money at the moment. But when I went up for my lesson on Friday I did casually ask what was happening with the mare, and my RI said that the owners had decided not to sell (and she isn't in foal...). So I'm glad that she has a home, and that I've had temptation removed! It scared me a bit how excited the idea of owning her made me for a few hours... Oh well one day...
And my lesson was fine - bit short cos I had to rush back to work - and my lower legs were moving around when they haven't for months (god knows why) - but I didn't feel scared so that was progress on the week before..
 
Bit of a pants lesson tonight, feeling annoyed with myself. I was pleased because I wasn't on my own, the girl who most often shares my lesson has been away for a few weeks, but tonight she was back. And I was pleased that I was able to ride Bea the whizzy little coblet I used to ride all the time but haven't had chance to recently. But there was another horse in the school at the same time as us (beautiful horse beautifully ridden) and Bea was scared of her! She was okay until the other mare spooked at something and after that Bea just kept cantering off at the drop of a hat, throwing in the odd buck for good measure...
I just felt like crying - the other girl in the lesson very kindly offered to swap with me - so I did. Bea still kept going ping but girl was much better at calming her down rather than getting wound up as well. And then, when I cantered Kas (who I'd swapped onto) he dramatically went ping as well - I think he put a big buck in too but I'm not sure - all I know is Julie was clearly pleased with me (and relieved!) that I was still on top.
Julie (my RI) told me I should go away proud because my position has improved so that even when my brain is panicking my body does the right thing. I know she is right - but I do just wish I didn't feel so scared... ho hum...
 
Be proud of yourself, I have experienced those Bea bucks first hand and they aren't the easiest to sit to, so you were obviously doing something right!

You will always have lessons where you don't feel 100% happy with yourself, I certainly have days where I get off mine now and feel a bit down that I haven't done as well as I know I should. So it's good that you have things you want to improve...but just don't beat yourself up and grind yourself down over them :)
 
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